A Brain Purge - Sorry!

Ok. So I've been trying to figure out the best way to blog about my summer here in DC. Honestly, I still have no idea how this is going to work. Especially since I've never been the type to just record events. Mostly because, as I'm sure you've noticed, I have a tendency to ramble and I get bored talking about things I've already done. I like to reflect on things and talk around the events. But, since I would greatly appreciate your prayers throughout this journey I will try to be a bit more specific as I write about this summer and my time here in the city.

This week has been a full one thus far and I can only imagine how crazy things are going to get once we actually have groups here. We've been in a lot of meetings with our bosses talking about all kinds of different aspects of this job. Things from what we can expect to see at the ministry sites to how to read a map and give directions to the drivers. We've also had the opportunity to experience some of the things the groups will be doing when they're here. We went on the prayer tour around the city. We've been to a bunch of different resturants. Yesterday we did the urban plunge in pairs. Basically, each person was given $2 and we were assigned a specific area of the city and told to go find dinner for the two of us and another person who looks like they need food. We were supposed to talk to this person and get a feel for what it is like to be living on the street and try and get this person a new pair of socks. Today we did a prayer walk down H street and had another opportunity to experience the city in a brand new way. One of the best part of the trip has been taking time to get to know the other 7 members of the staff. Along with the "scheduled bonding time" we (and I say we with the assumption that the other staffers agree with me) have had a great time hanging out together in our free time. Monday night we sent our designated driver (Thanks for having a car Craig!) and a couple others to target and they came back with ice cream and a movie from red box. Tuesday night we all went down to the national mall and just walked around. Yesterday we watched Finding Nemo and ate more ice cream. Tonight, the president of CSM was in town and he treated us all to some awesome fro yo downtown.

The greatest thing about every single experience I've had so far is how it has just reaffirmed the fact that I know this is where God wants me to be this summer. I wouldn't say that I'm entirely comfortable with all the work we've been doing, but I'd be scared if that was the case. However, I am constantly being reminded that this is the kind of thing every Christian is called to. Maybe not to serve directly in the city, but to somehow have a ministry of love for all God's children. And this summer I have the incredible opportunity to work with a very diverse group of His children. From the residents of DC and the ministry sites we work with to the youth groups that roll through here each week. The opportunity to both serve in the city and share this passion with young Christians is a unique one that I am excited to experience. In all honesty, right now there is nothing about this summer that does not excite me. God is here in Washington DC and I cannot wait to see how He reveals Himself. I've already seen Him in both of my bosses, in each and every member of the staff here, in Creed who so graciously allowed Lukas and me to share a meal with him in his living room. I don't want to lose this passion and desire to serve just because I've had a long week. I don't want to have my heart hardened and eyes closed to God's children because there is a particularly difficult group. If I could ask one thing of you it would be that you keep me, this staff, our ministry partners, the groups and the people of DC in your prayers. I'm going to try and be specific when I can, but just be thankful that the Holy Spirit is more articulate than I and capable of directing our prayers to fit God's will.

And We're Off!

Ok. So, I know it's been forever since I've been around here. I mean, I was still in school for my last post. Now I've been out for a month and officially started work today. As most of you know, I will be spending the summer in Washington DC working for a ministry called the Center for Student Missions. This organization plans mission trips for various groups, mostly junior and senior high youth groups during the summer, and it is my job to show these groups around the city and act as their contact to the different ministry sites they work with. I was excited about this job the moment I heard about the opportunity and I can't believe I'm actually here now.

But, before I go rambling on about the job and all that jazz, I'll give you an (abreviated) update on my summer so far. It's so crazy glue to think that I've already been out of school for a month! The past month has been filled with all kinds of randomness and fun. I took a late nightroad trip up to DC to celebrate the end of finals. I went to the beach with some dear friends. I watched some friends from college graduate and I went home to see my baby sister get back from prom. I sat in church and listened to high school seniors give their senior messages. I shared coffee and meals with friends and family all over York. I "babysat" my darling cousins for a week. I had a surprise visit from an old friend. But those are just some things I did. If you're a polite person you'll probably pretend that you care, but don't feel like you have to. Because while I had great fun this past month, I know that God has been preparing my heart for this summer. And that's more important than anything I orchestrated in my time at home.

I have a lot to look forward to this summer and I can't wait to see how God is going to use this team of people He's brought together and the groups He places in our care to bring His glory to DC! I arrived here at the site around 1 this afternoon unpacked and said good bye to my family. I eventually got to meet the other members of the team and we got training underway. Basically we talked a little, went to dinner and then our bosses took us on the prayer tour that we'll be leading for the groups we host. I LOVE that the first thing we do in the city with the groups is take them around to pray over it. This provides a great first look at the city, some of it's greatest struggles and some of it's greatest strengths. When we talked about the tour later, a lot of people expressed feeling overwhelmed by everything they saw. For me it was a bit differerent. I've served here before. I've seen the poverty and the people of this city. And God has laid them on my heart. Not so much in an "I ache for the pain they're feeling" kimd of way but more in a "look what this city could do for Me" kimd of way. The way that makes me desire to see the people here through God's eyes. To see the people as children of the King and think about how their lives could impact the Kingdom. And this is not an easy thing to do or aspire to. I want to' see people as the flawed beings I know they are instead of the perfect beings God has created them to be. But it does create a sense of hope I know I can rely on. I know this is not going to be an easy summer. And there are going to be times when the things I learn or see are going to break my heart and truly make me feel ache for the poor and downtrodden of this place. But I also know that God has big things in store for Washington DC and the people living there. Because this city houses His children. And His children have the potential to change the world. Because He is in His children. And where His children go, He goes. And where God goes, great things are bound to happen. So this city is not going to have a clue what hit it. God's brought some of His children from all over the country to serve for a summer in this city. And each week He's sending some of His children here. Add in His children who live in this city and it's clear that God's ready to do big things. And I can't wait to see Him glorified in this city. I'm ready for this journey.

Dem Bones

"I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked me, 'Son of man, can these bones live?' I said, 'O Sovereign Lord, you alone know.'" Ezekiel 37:2-3

I went to a Bible Study on Romans this evening. I'm pretty sure we're still on Romans 1:1. I say pretty sure because we got quite off topic and started talking about predestination vs free will. I'm not even going to go into that because ultimately it's not important. But, my pastor is more inclined to be in the predestination camp and somebody was asking him how we are supposed to know who the "predestined" are. Basically - this was the story that my pastor directed us to. Ezekiel & the valley of the dry bones.

I've heard this story before. I've sung "Dem bones, dem bones, dem dry bones....hear the word of the Lord". But tonight it was one of those "I'm going to open your eyes to this story in a whole new way" kind of things. Thanks for that God! But for real. That should be our interaction with every single person. God asks us "Can this person be alive in Me?" and our response should always be "God, only you know that, but I'll do whatever you desire to make that happen."

Ezekiel prophesied & spoke the word of God to a valley of bones. And they came to life. And the breath of God was breathed into them. Who are we to say that God can't use us to work in somebody's life? Who are we to say that somebody can't be saved?

The Hour When Darkness Reigns

"But the other criminal rebuked him, 'Don't you fear God,' he said, 'since you are under the same sentence? We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.' Then he said, 'Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.' Jesus answered him, 'I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise."

- Luke 23:40-43

Today is Good Friday. A day typically set aside to remember the Passion of Christ. It's a day where we should be stopping our daily activities to focus on what Jesus did on the cross - taking our sin as His burden and returning it to the place it belongs.

So straight up, complete honesty time. I've talked about my whole pride thing before but I'm about to jump to a whole new level of arrogance - so bear with me here. Not only can I convince myself that I am in control of my life and don't really need God, but I have been to that place where I hear "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" and scoff at it. Because, sure, I've made mistakes, but, come on, they really weren't THAT horrible and certainly they weren't anywhere near "actual sin". Yes - I've been to that place more often and more recently than I'd care to admit.

I'd like to believe that God's just up on His throne shaking His head at me, chuckling at my insanely unwarranted arrogance, but I know that's probably not the case. The truth is, every time I go to that place where I am convinced I don't need a thing to do with God, I break His heart. I might as well be standing at the foot of the cross, pointing and laughing at that naked man with the crown of thorns who's claiming to be the Son of God and King of the Jews. I am that 1st criminal, hanging right next to Christ, continuing to mock and insult Him. I'm not up there long - it's usually only a matter of minutes before somebody or something acts as that 2nd criminal in my life, calling me out on my crap and reminding me that I deserve every bit of my punishment. I am humbled and suddenly I'm Barabbas, and Christ is hanging on the cross in my place.

My trips to that place are almost always associate with those times in my life when I believe I'm doing and saying all the "right" things, playing the part of "super-Christian" to a tee and yet I'm neglecting to actually spend time with God. I know - it's shocking. Feeling like I don't need God when I'm not actively seeking Him. Anyway - I was approaching that place earlier this week. Then, on Wednesday I came crashing back to reality. A friend was telling me about this new church he was attending and mentioned that his pastor has recently spoken about the need for the church to have a spirit of confession in its community. Being that I was on my way to that place I half expected to be laughing internally at the notion of confessing to both God and community. However I certainly surprised myself when I started nodding along in agreement because I actually agreed with him and not just for the sake of nodding.

I share this with you for a single purpose. Because it brought me to a place where I could truly celebrate the sacrifice of Christ. Today, as I knelt before the cross I didn't have search for a reason to be there. It was the only place that made sense to be. I wasn't there because the pastor told me to be, or I felt I should because everybody else was doing it. I knew my list of transgressions and I knew that they were no longer my burden to bear. When darkness seemed to reign over the earth, I could rejoice in knowing that God is glorified through the events of today - of Good Friday.

So Good!

And what more shall I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets—who through faith conquered kingdoms, enforced justice, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, were made strong out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight. Women received back their dead by resurrection. Some were tortured, refusing to accept release, so that they might rise again to a better life. Others suffered mocking and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were killed with the sword. They went about in skins of sheep and goats, destitute, afflicted, mistreated—of whom the world was not worthy—wandering about in deserts and mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth.

And all these, though commended through their faith, did not receive what was promised, since God had provided something better for us, that apart from us they should not be made perfect.

Hebrews 11:32-40

Chew on this for a while. It's so good!!!!

Lenten Sacrifices

So...I know I'm a bit behind, seeing as Lent started yesterday and all, but I really want to do something this year to celebrate the Lenten season.

Tuesday night in my Social Theories class we got on the topic of what life would be like if there were no more entertainers to "enrich" our lives. A friend of mine freely admitted to watching Lifetime in her spare time so my professor asked her if she would feel a hole in her life if she no longer had that "luxury". Everybody laughed about it and she answered very honestly that no, her life would not be "impoverished" if Lifetime no longer existed. This was about the time that I started to zone out and not pay attention, partially because we had already been sitting there for over an hour, but mostly because I started to think about how different life would be if I wasn't so focused on other people entertaining me and actually shifted my focus to things that really matter.

Right before this class as we were walking from the BCM my friends and I were discussing Lent and the things that people give up for that season. I made the statement that if you can't come up with something to give up, it is just as effective to add something into your life that helps you to focus on God. And I do believe that Lent is about making time to spend with God in a manner that allows you to reflect on and prepare for the Easter season. Lent is not about what we give up just to "do Lent". But really, there are so many things that clutter our lives that it should not be that difficult to come up with one thing we can do without. Especially if we make a commitment to fill that void with God. So what if Lifetime leaves a hole in somebody's life, God can fill that hole. If I'm going to make the commitment to give something up, I want it to be coupled with a desire to grow closer to God. What good is giving up television if my time isn't spent being more purposeful in my relationships and growing in Christ? Does giving up sweets really remind me of who my Savior is?

I still don't know exactly what I'm going to be doing for Lent - but I want to be sure it includes a commitment to my relationship with Christ. If I come up with something, I'll try to let you know. In the mean time - how do you celebrate Lent?

Stream of Semi-Consciousness

When I seek comfort in solitude, am I looking for You?

When I celebrate with friends, do I rejoice in You?

When I sit in a classroom, am I growing in You?

When I sing at the top of my lungs, am I singing Your praise?

When I help those around me, am I serving in Your name?

When I speak "words of wisdom", are they filled with Your love?

When I cry myself to sleep, do I cry out to You?

When I desire forgiveness, do I think about Your sacrifice?

When I revel in the beauty of this world, am I standing in awe of You?

When I long to be home, do I dream of Your outstretched arms?

When I argue or anger, do I remember Your grace?

When I think of my ordinary days, do I see Your hand?

When I live my life, am I living for You?